As I’m looking around a conference room with around 400 people in attendance I’m thinking about all these people being cute little babies and toddlers at one time. I’m thinking how I love my little girl and how I take care of her. That one day she will be a grown up and do adult things like I am sitting in a big conference room.
I look at all these people and no matter their background someone, maybe mom, dad, grandma or lots of different people took care of each of these people enough that they are sitting here today. Someone fed them, held them, and took care of them when they were sick. Someone had looked at them with love as a baby whether they know it or not.
I think about how my mother must have loved holding me and cuddling me as a baby. How she couldn’t believe she made something so special as me. Just like how I now can look at my child and have tears in my eyes because I think she is so wonderful and perfect. I can’t believe how good God is to let us experience something so amazing as having a child.
When you look around at people try to picture them as a sweet innocent baby that a mother took care of. I think it really helps us not to judge people. We all were that little baby once and someone cared for us. If only we could keep that care for people as they grow up.
A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.
By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.
Why is it so hard to love and not judge others?
For me love prevailed over the worry to bring another human into this crazy world. I know at one point in my childless adulthood I really pondered whether I wanted to ever have children. One of the main reasons was the fear of the future. I didn’t want my children to go through a war or disaster. I didn’t want them to have to deal with the sinful world and all the bad that comes with it.
Then I realized all of that is mostly out of my control and all I can do as a parent is give my children the love that God has taught me to give. Actually I can give my children a better life because of my faith. Not that I can give them more material things or more opportunities in life, but that I can give them more wisdom and compassion for life.
I’m so glad love prevailed and I decided to have children. My daughter has taught me more about life than I could have ever figured out on my own. I have more wisdom and compassion because of her which in turn only gives me more of a reason to teach her the same. The journey of life is so interesting. Every day it seems that I learn something or change a hard held opinion of what I thought about life. If I keep letting love prevail who knows what doors will be opened to me.
Children are a heritage from the Lord , offspring a reward from him.
How has your opinion on life changed over time?
Don’t get married without at least considering how serious a change it should be and the precious gift it truly is. Since my marriage the phrase that has been bothersome to hear people say is,”Well nothing is really going to change when we get married.” I wish we took marriage more seriously. We need to treat marriage as a gift! We need to treat it as one of the biggest committments of our life. We want our relationship to grow and change because we are now one. Two become one, a team, working toward common goals. Even if you’ve already been a couple for a long time, use marriage as a fresh start!
Thanks to my church and our recent marriage sermon I have more talking points. Your spouse is your companion that has decided to be there for you your whole life. That’s pretty special. Also you should cling to one another because you will surely need eachother in the journey of life. My husband felt I needed to say, “but not too clingy because a man needs some space”. Mmmhmm.
Marriage is a life changer and it should be! We are vowing to God to spiritually, physically and emotionally care for our spouse. If we don’t change our way of thinking about me versus we then marriage will be even more of a struggle. Maybe even a struggle we decide not to continue.
Marriage is hard no matter how you go into it, but the committment, communication and change it takes is what will keep you going through the journey. Faith in God can make all the difference in the way you feel about marriage. Our faith gives us the skills we need to have a successful marriage.
The Bible tells us to have a servant’s heart, and more importantly to compare our marriage relationship to that of Christ and the church. That means we need to sacrifice ourselves and what we want for the benefit of our relationship.
I truly feel we need to make a daily effort to treat our spouse better or nothing will change. I’m sure everyone would love to have a better relationship with their spouse. Give God the glory in your marriage and cling to your companion.
and the two will become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two, but one flesh.
Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”
What changed when you got married?
Motherhood: trying to find balance between a love for a child that is incomprehensible even to myself and yet still trying to form this little child into an independently capable and compassionate adult of the future.
That is my struggle. I want to love and hold and do everything for this cute little child of mine, but I can’t because I need her to grow and learn and become herself. That struggle is why last night was the night of 240 mommy’s. I heard my daughter coughing around two in the morning and my mommy heart broke that she was uncomfortable and not able to do anything for herself. So I got up and took some water in the room for her. That turned into “mommy up” and I really wanted her to stay in bed right then. We went around and around with rubbing head and lay down and mommy is right here until I got upset that I even went in her room. She was fine, she wasn’t crying she was just coughing. Now I turned this middle of the night situation into a who can be more stubborn when we both know the outcome- she’s coming into my bed at the end of this.
I tell her if she doesn’t lay down mommy is going back to bed. She says no mommy up so I leave the room. For the next 4 minutes, even though it felt like at least an hour, she said mommy in every different possible way she could think of.
I didn’t actually count but if she said mommy every second for 4 minutes that would be 240. It was torture to my mommy heart but I was so stubborn in my middle of the night stupor that I sat and listened for those 4 minutes until my husband came out and said just give in! So we both go in there and that turns it into a “no daddy go away!” and a crying fit that lands her in our bed. Which by the way resulted instantaneously in silence once her head hit the pillow on our bed. She won.
Then after I cool down from the last hour of our night escapade she crawls over me and snuggles as close as she possibly can to my body with her cheek against mine. Sigh..now comes the mommy guilt. Of course all I want to do is snuggle like this all night every night with her, she’s my baby. I only get a few years at most of these snuggles and then it is over! But as I have been told a million times by people, books, and online articles I need to teach my child how to sleep. Oh and sleep alone! So the struggle with my indescribable love for my child and my need to create a functioning adult of the future will continue on. It’s about to get more complicated with baby #2 coming in two months. Can my mommy heart fill that full and not explode?
Soon I won’t even remember the night of 240 mommy’s, but I’m not sure if that will be from the current sleep deprivation or lack of importance of one night in what will be many many more. What I will remember is how much I enjoy being a mother and how each day my child teaches me how to love even more. I’m very blessed to have even one night of 240 mommy’s! *muah*
And for your watching pleasure here’s Jim Gaffigan on the topic.
What’s your funny but true motherhood definition?
This is the story of how I met my husband which also has a lot to do with how I met our Father. Our Father or God.
I met my husband the beginning of our senior year of college. We both didn’t want to meet anyone seeing as we were ready to be done and move on from college. That plan didn’t work. We ended up in study groups together, walking home from class together and playing racquetball and ping pong together. After many late nights of mario cart there was no denying we were falling for eachother.
We felt we both were Christians brought up going to church even though I had lost touch of my faith during my college years. I knew he was a good man and would be a great husband and father in the future. I knew he would always make me want to be a better person.
My husband brought me back to my faith and helped me see what I was missing. Our struggles make me look to God and ask him for support. Our blessings make me realize how grateful to God I should be. Our marriage gives me just a glimpse into an everlasting love that God is so willing to give me.
So even though the story of how I met my husband is the one we would be asked the story of how you met your Father/God is much more important. It goes beyond our short life on earth and connects you to your everlasting life in heaven. My faith gives me all the more reason to live a God pleasing life on earth.
Thank you for everything Father especially that sweet man you found for me to share my life with who has shown me how to grow closer to you.